FCC Adds Words “Bernie Sanders” to On-Air Blacklist

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WASHINGTON, D.C. — At the behest of DNC Chair and Florida Representative Debbie Wasserman-Schultz, FCC Chair Tom Wheeler added the words “Bernie Sanders” and “Bern” to the FCC’s blacklist, or the FCC’s list of words television and radio broadcasters are not allowed to say or show on-air.

“Any networks that broadcast the ‘B’ word, intentionally or accidentally, may face a fine not to exceed $150,000 for the first offense. Our Enforcement Bureau will escalate fines on a case-by-case basis after said first offense,” read a press release from Wheeler’s office.

When reached for comment, Debbie Wasserman-Schultz declared, “This is a watershed moment for decency and [capitalism]. Now we will be able to insure that the American people and their children will not have to be subject to grass-roots vulgarity.”

“While I am happy with Chairman Wheeler’s progress on this front, I am disappointed that the FCC chose not to address obscene phrases as ‘Drug War’ and ‘582.7 billion dollars,'” Wasserman-Schultz continued.

In wake of this news, MSNBC has implemented a censorship system that bleeps out every on-air mention of “Bernie Sanders” or “Bern” with a special word or phrase.

MSNBC’s system was first deployed on Rev. Al Sharpton’s PoliticsNation, on which guest Dr. Cornel West could be heard saying, “Yes, I am feeling the -Clint-!”

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